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"Okay Romances of the 21st Century" by Nicolette Yarbrough

Braces: Blonde, Canadian. We met when I was 12 and you sat in front of me in the camp orchestra. We kissed, my first, at night by the infirmary when you were picking up your acne meds. You had me at accutane.

"Great Romances of the 20th Century" Taking Back Sunday (Today this is, truly, unlistenable)

Oboe Face: Set the precident for my future relationships. You asked me out and I wasn't sure, and 3 months later I'm crying on the Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk to the Killers album you put on my ipod. It's my fault we were never friends after that, even though we went to high school and college together. Sorry.

"Mr. Brightside" The Killers

"Under My Thumb" The Rolling Stones

Air Jordans: We've known each other since we were kids, and technically were never together, but I had my first trip to 3rd base with you. Terrible for my self esteem. You rejected me at a dance in the multi-purpose room, but I got my revenge later on a class trip to China. You asked me pErSoNaL questions over iChat, I gave myself away too easily to be interesting to you.

"Confessions pt. 2" Usher

"Obstacle 1" Interpol

Hot Tub: We also met at music camp, that pubescent and hormonal hotbed of sin. I had my eye on someone else, but you charmed me with your athleticism in the kickball game. When we broke up it was the only time I didn't cry. I regret humoring you on the internet because to this day you still won't leave me alone. BLOCKED.

"King Without A Crown - Live At Stubb's" Matisyahu

"Cecilia" Simon and Garfunkel

Mop Head: Puppy Love. The first boy I met in high school. You played guitar in the hallway after the bell rang, and we lasted until your dad made you break up with me when he found us making out under a table in a dark classroom. We avoided eye contact after that.

"Maybe I'm Amazed" Paul McCartney

DON'T DATE THIS BOY: I fell in love on the dancefloor of the Jewish Community Center. On a seperate occasion, you took me to your private school formal and grinded on other girls while I watched. No one pities a wallflower. I slammed my front gate in your face, and you totally deserved it. Double popped collars were never cool, guy.

"Wanna Love You Girl" Robin Thicke ft. Pharrell

"Sweet Adeline" Elliot Smith

Humboldt: Sweetest beginning, longest ending. Our first kiss was upside down ala Spiderman/Seth & Summer. You were the form my angst took at 16; a long-distance escape from friends I didn't like. Our relationship lived in Greyhound busses, cellphone overages, fights with my mom, and some songs dedicated to your's-truly recorded on a shitty computer mic. At one point you meant the most to me, and I learned how easy it can be to fall out of love. I wish I could always write like you do. We grew up a bit together.

"Pink Bullets" The Shins

"At The Hop" Devendra Banhart

Kick Flip: Shirts too big and off-buttoned. Premature beard. You're always a little ripped up like you fell off a skateboard, and visibly uncomfortable in formal concert attire. Neverending patience, never went to class. Sorry I wasn't available for you.

"The Firebird Suite: Danse infernale du roi Kastchei" Igor Stravinsky, BRT Philharmonic Orchestra

"Keep Ya Head Up" 2Pac

Half-Nelson: Met on grad night. Richmond District, Chrome backpack, fixie. You surprised me when you acted out a porn fantasy on my back. Maybe that's a story you tell your bros now, or maybe you do it all the time. Either way, get it together. At a beach bonfire you and Peter forgot to hide the booze but talked your way out of an arrest. Kudos.

"Jesus, Etc." Wilco

"Electric Feel" MGMT

U Crew: Another camp boy, another lapse in judgement. We saw "The Twilight Saga: New Moon" together, your choice. You had the exact face I pictured my husband having when I was 8. We both knew what it was. Enjoy the army, your wife, and future children, sincerely.

"Why Georgia" John Mayer

Shy Guy: Still waiting for a moment of clarity about it. Maybe it won't come.

"On A Good Day" Joanna Newsom

"The Blind Leaving the Blind Mvt. 2" Punch Brothers

"Bad In Each Other" Feist



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