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Hold Still, You Fuck! :: Songs I’d Listen to if I Were a Demented Villain by Annelise Stabenau

“I’ll send you a love letter, straight from my heart, fucker! You know what a love letter is? It's a bullet from a fucking gun, fucker! You receive a love letter from me, you're fucked forever! You understand, fuck? I'll send you straight to hell, fucker!”

A villain listening to catchy music temporarily raises a viewer's threshold for violence. You are inclined to drink more than you otherwise would and you feel exceptionally nauseous once it’s too late. This device has become a trope and it’s one of my favorites because I like feeling sick to my stomach and music.

Song to dance around in nothing but a kimono as my victims suffer in a dark well below:

"Ridin Round", Kali Uchis

Song to smoke a cigar as I hold a gun to the face of my naked lover:

"Angel Baby", Rosie & The Originals

Song to play on the radio as I slice my victim’s ear off with a rusty knife:

"Hotline Bling", Erykah Badu

Song to sing a capella as I break into my victim’s homes and terrorize them:

"Wuthering Heights", Kate Bush

Song to play in my car as my cronies hold back my victim and I kiss him and punch him like a sack of potatoes: "Just One Look", Doris Troy

Inspiration: Blue Velvet (1986)

Song to ambush my coworker and murder him with an axe:

"Kill V. Maim", Grimes



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